fix: record contact-card EOSEs from the d-tag so card syncs are incremental

UserCardsSubAssembler.newEose read the filter's p-tags to stamp each target
user's card EOSE, but kind:30382 filters address targets in the d-tag — so
no per-user EOSE was ever recorded, groupByRelayPresence always classified
users as never-checked, and every filter update re-downloaded the visible
users' cards with since = null. Read the d-tag instead, and use DTag.TAG_NAME
on both the filter builder and the EOSE reader so the two keys cannot drift
apart again. Pre-existing on main; surfaced while verifying that card syncs
are incremental from the account's outbox relays.

Co-Authored-By: Claude Fable 5 <noreply@anthropic.com>
Claude-Session: https://claude.ai/code/session_01QdvE4LvgkSewJXyFzyyAUY

amethyst/src/main/java/com/vitorpamplona/amethyst/service/relayClient/reqCommand/user/watchers/UserCardsSubAssembler.kt

@@ -33,6 +33,7 @@ import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.relay.client.INostrClient
 import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.relay.client.pool.RelayBasedFilter
 import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.relay.filters.Filter
 import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.relay.normalizer.NormalizedRelayUrl
+import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.tags.dTag.DTag
 import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.utils.mapOfSet
 
 class UserCardsSubAssembler(
@@ -46,7 +47,10 @@ class UserCardsSubAssembler(
         filters: List<Filter>?,
     ) {
         filters?.forEach { filter ->
-            filter.tags?.get("p")?.forEach {
+            // kind:30382 addresses the target user in the d-tag (the key the
+            // filter builder uses). Reading any other tag leaves the per-user
+            // EOSEs unset and forces full re-downloads with since = null.
+            filter.tags?.get(DTag.TAG_NAME)?.forEach {
                 val targetUser = cache.getUserIfExists(it)
                 targetUser?.cardsOrNull()?.latestEOSEs?.newEose(relay, time)
             }

commons/src/commonMain/kotlin/com/vitorpamplona/amethyst/commons/relayClient/assemblers/ContactCardFilters.kt

@@ -24,6 +24,7 @@ import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.core.HexKey
 import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.relay.client.pool.RelayBasedFilter
 import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.relay.filters.Filter
 import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.relay.normalizer.NormalizedRelayUrl
+import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip01Core.tags.dTag.DTag
 import com.vitorpamplona.quartz.nip85TrustedAssertions.users.ContactCardEvent
 
 val ContactCardKindList = listOf(ContactCardEvent.KIND)
@@ -46,7 +47,8 @@ fun filterContactCardsToTargetKeysFromTrustedAccountsInTheRelay(
             Filter(
                 kinds = ContactCardKindList,
                 authors = trustedAccounts,
-                tags = mapOf("d" to targets.sorted()),
+                // kind:30382 addresses the target user in the d-tag
+                tags = mapOf(DTag.TAG_NAME to targets.sorted()),
                 since = since,
             ),
     )